Unkind Granola

Hey y'all it's been a few days my apologies.

I went to go see Jaime Woods last night with Angelo, it was really beautiful. Before she sang her last song she asked everyone to take a moment of silence for all the lives lost on Friday. Then, she had us, the audience, sing in a round, something along the lines of "Patience my dear, your peace will come." She had a beautiful, beautiful voice.

When we got inside a waitress came up to me and asked if I wanted anything to drink. "Oh, no thank you!" I said. Then she told me there was a one drink minimum. >.> So I ordered a glass of wine (I was too shy to say "uh your cheapest drink then") and Angelo, the pro that he is, ordered their four dollar bottled water.

I hate that drink-minimum bullshit. Especially because you often don't know until you've already paid to get in. I don't even want a drink. Some comedy clubs have two drink minimums.

Guys, guys, GUYS. Washing machine? Working. Microwave? Replaced. Mouse? Presumably dead but not on any of the sticky traps we laid out. A little worrisome but overall, good.

AND we got a mailer promo for an on-demand cleaning service: $20 for a three hour cleaning. So that's happening right now. I'm back at my old haunt, Mountain Provence with my arch nemesis cranky bald barista while our Handy maid cleans our teeny-tiny, dirty apartment.

Ah I got home from Mountain Provence and the cleaning lady was finishing up. I went and sat on my bed and looked at the room, everything looked nice and clean. On my desk, however, I noticed my D&D dice and mini figurine (which I custom ordered and hand painted) were missing. I found the dice just to the side of where they usually sit but after a quick scan of my room I could not find my figurine. I didn't want this lady to think I came home and immediately started counting a tally of all my possessions, but this figurine is special to me and a personal staple of my desk decor; I instinctively noticed its absence. Everyone in my D&D crew has one, customized to look like each of our characters. I bring it, wrapped in tissue in a small plastic case, to every D&D session.

I went to the kitchen and sheepishly asked her if she knew where it was. She said she had put it on the bed while she was cleaning the desk. Sure enough, there on the ground, next to my bed was a broken mini.

"Oh no you smushed him!" She said. I was a little disgruntled that this had become my fault but truthfully I may have knocked it to the ground when I sat on my bed.

It is a clean break between base and figure, but the tops of her fingers are also missing and those are lost forever I fear. Too small to glue back on even if I did find them. Sigh, I'm pretty bummed guys. Isn't that dumb?

Also two days ago I bought a package of KIND peanut butter granola and found what looked like cobwebs inside. I sent them an email right away and held onto the package as evidence. They wrote back, apologizing profusely, asking for batch info, where I bought it, etc. I opened the bag again to check on the cobwebs and there were little white worm larvae hanging in the webbing. I could not have closed that bag fast enough. Looks like I'm never buying KIND granola ever, ever again!